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Saturday, March 26, 2011

Timed Bomb


To gaze up,
Toward the sky

Through the little spotlights
Called stars

Your chosen to be all you can

Find yourself among those stars

Connect the lively pictures

For whats hidden in a time box
Called space

3-17-11

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Off the Beaten Path


I run from myself
My troubles
My life

Until I'm lost among the wild

I seek peace from the memories
The hurt
The sorrow

But here I find a flower
Filled with blush
Of pink

And it all comes rushing back
You and me
Us

Here we are together again
In my regretted memories

You drown me even when I run
You find me
Even when I flee

Where can I escape you
I wonder softly

Maybe if I walk and walk one day
You will disappear from my shadows

So, there, I began.

3-16-11

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

What is 'us' if Not a Happy Fairytale?

To me you came through nighttime

Horrors you told to me

As you identity lied beneath a mask of unfaithfulness

For you I laid my life down

And to you I gave my womanly dignity

In return I got to be part of the life of yours and mine

Separated by simply thoughts

You watched me

You wanted me

So I let you take me

I played as your connection to the world here

You stayed my fantasy

You stayed my mind play

What was all you had, was dreams to me

You felt only what I forgot

When times came,

I had to return to reality

While you had no where to go

But to the back of my mind

I had to put an end to us, end to you

I had to end this fairytale

Without thank you, or regret

You'll die among the restless

Or upon the 7 seas

But me you cant chain or bind

To wrist less ghouls and ghosts

3-14-11

Blinded by Darkness


As love goes and grows
You share your worlds

But why is it
That when I take your eyes
Along my journey

Only pain can be seen
Only sorrow is present

Why then
Cant you see
The inside of me

Is it to dark in my past
Or, are you blinded?

I wish only to remove
The hurt, from unwanted fools

And replace them all with you
Simple as can be

3-14-11


Monday, March 14, 2011

Did you find me?


From the day we met

It was fake

Pieces it, we clicked together like a pad lock

And so our journey began

You placed me on a cloud

Safe and happy I'd be

I'd stay,

Although unaware of all earthly harm

They day we began

I was blinded  by love

But you weren't?

I was fully indulged

But you were a realist?

I dreamed childishly

While you stood by, listening hardly

The day you broke my heart

You  were fine

Not a flinch,

Or a peek of a tear

Nor a frown

Simply a goodbye of lifelessness

That day, I awoke from my dreams

And feel, harder than imaginable

I fell through the clouds

Through the atmosphere, past the buildings and trees

And hit reality, finally, when you moved on

So there I lie, on the street

Below my window sill,

Without a beat from my broken heart

3-7-11

Friday, March 11, 2011

From Afar


Each day I sit and watch my love

I watch her from afar

For fear of scaring her

I keep my love in shadows

My face, wounded of battle
scarred to point of un-identity

Hers better than an angels
Perfection is, in everyway, present
Like innocent in the eyes of a new born

I refer to her as thy lost

For I have found,
And felt what she will never

I do not possess her heart or her in ways I wish

But to see her happy,
Is enough to plug my gapping hole of loneliness

The best days are those that she confronts me

To buy a book, like she does offten,

Every book she buys, I read too

Informal, fictional, whatever her knowledge lies I want

In some small (extremely small) way it makes me feel like we have that connection

One day you come to me,
And asked me for advice

I tried to cover my face,
But you re-fused to let me

A book, you asked about

Lost, I got in your smile

Stare, I began too without realizing

And soon enough my scars I excepted

And one day, at your little coffee table,

You stared back too.

3-7-11

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Changes in perspective


As I had always dreamt of growing
It did not only include on the outside

I wanted to be wise
And experienced in living beyond my years

Like any curious teenage girl
I wanted to rule high school
Friends at my dispense,
Jealous girls with my heels

Those seem so insignificant now,
In this state of mind

For I may not live to see these high school years,
But death made me wiser than I'd ever imagined on earth

To bad its not any of my interests anymore

Now that I realize this, its too late

They say not to mourn over and unchangeable yesterday

But what else is there to do?

When im surrounded by a never-ending today of nothingness

From this 'heaven' anything is creatable simply by desire

It was then, easy to see that getting whatever you want
When you want it

Is meaningless and makes you capable of enjoying nothing

So here I watch our unchanging lives play out

Going over every memory I have and speculating how I got to my grave

Wrong place, wrong time would not please my mind hunger

3-7-11